You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
