All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Randomize
