Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
Randomize
