I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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