this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
It's shark week go big or go home
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
