Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize
