I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize