Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
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