I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Welp...herpes.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Randomize
