Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
i just had sex bonerless
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
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