google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Randomize
