Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Randomize
