She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
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