Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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