My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
We need to get me chipped asap
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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