Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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