I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
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