chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
