yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
