This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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