hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
