My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize