I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
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