5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
