Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
