I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
