i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
Randomize
