Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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