Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
They took my balls.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Randomize
