I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize
