super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
