giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Randomize
