garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
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