u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Randomize
