Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Randomize
