Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
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