genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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