I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
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