Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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