He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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