Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
