How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
