You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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