Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
