Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
