Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize