I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize
