I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Randomize
