Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
then my best friend's brother, boyfriend, and future bro in law showed up at the bar. they asked who i was there with. didn't know if "a 40 year old man" or "my 5th grade teacher" was better answer.
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize