Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
Randomize
