I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize
