You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Randomize
